Still Choosing the Dream

Possibilities excite me. They always have. I’d even call myself a full devotee to “will it happen?” energy. The Land of Unknown is where my goals/dreams push past the doubt monster, leave his tortuous skepticism behind, and materialize from the fog. It’s where they solidify and take up residence in my brain.

My dreams motivate me. My lofty goals are what makes me do the work. I don’t need convincing to roll up my sleeves. The work is simply part of my process because dreams don’t come true on their own. Anyone in the dream trenches knows this fact.

The bigger the goal the more one is forced to reach up, up, up, and push themselves from their comfort zone. Mountain top heights. One’s focus needs to be locked in because the fall is long. Soul

crushing.

Despite landing three different and incredible literary agents and getting four book deals, publishing crushed my soul quite a few times. I bounced down that damn mountain, hitting trees and boulders, leaving bits of myself. I’d reach the bottom bruised and bloody but alive, only to climb back up with a new book, a new agent, new submissions, then whoosh, down I went. Years of rejection, pass, rejection, pass. Spreadsheets filled with editors who said no thank you.

Almost a year ago I decided to unearth my unreached publishing goals. They were buried deep under the rubble. I was agent-less. My last novel released in 2017. I had unsold manuscripts that I loved and believed in.

I’m doing publishing on my own this time. I researched the publishing houses who accept un-agented manuscripts, I wrote the pitch letters, I created the submission spreadsheet, I followed up. I asked the contract questions. While terrifying, it’s also quite satisfying.

And thrilling.

Now that I have two upcoming YA releases (PORTAL coming in 2017 and SAFETY IN LIES) I can't wait to get back in front of young readers. Talking craft, talking book, talking possibilities....